There are some who believe they are perfect, never struggle with their faith and somehow hold it together no matter what life throws at them. For the rest of us, we wrestle with our insecurities, struggle with our ability to believe and go through all sorts of contortions with each new challenge we face.
The reason I have chosen to open my heart and share personal details of what I have gone through in this life is for the benefit of those who also face heartbreak, heartache, disillusion, deception, pain, sorrow, anger, confusion and a whole array of other hassles in this life. I have been there, done that and somehow by the grace and mercy of God am still standing.
I have always been my own worst enemy. My most difficult task in this life is to believe that I am worthy of anything good. I tend to dwell upon all the things I do wrong, all the times I fall short in my walk and all the ways I wish I could and would do things better. The only way I ever manage to do anything good is when I focus on Jesus Christ and have faith in His abilities and qualities within me.
I have sat through, and even used to teach classes on building self esteem and self confidence. I suppose there was some merit in all this, but for the most part I came to the conclusion long ago that our strength and confidence is in the Lord and not in ourselves. I believe that if the Lord wants me to do something, He must give me the ability, strength and power to do it.
Philippians 4 tells us that we can do all things through Christ who gives us strength. Philippians 4 also tells us to be anxious for nothing but in everything through prayer and supplication let our requests be known unto God. So many times, the root cause of our anxieties is the fear within us that we are not good enough, strong enough or able to handle a situation that arises in life. This is why we must learn how to “let go and let God”, for in so doing we learn that our strength is in Him and not ourselves.
Many of us think that God gets tired of us crying out to Him all the time. We think that we are a burden to Him I guess. The truth is that God NEVER grows weary of our cries but instead cherishes them. It is only when we become too self reliant, too cold or too indifferent that we stop “bugging God” about stuff and that is when we lose His comfort, exhortation, instruction and edification. We are then truly on our own and that is not a good thing.
I pray that in some way all these blogs I have been writing recently have helped you see that it is not the end of the world to falter, be scared, mess everything up or feel totally inadequate. In reality, these are expressions of our humanity, and we are still humans until Christ returns. Until that great and glorious day, NEVER think it is wrong or a sin to pour out your heart to the Lord.
No matter what comes up in life, God is there to listen and help. No matter how lonely, depressed, upset or confused you may be, God is waiting with outstretched arms to hold you tight and help you through it. I pray that we never become so full of ourselves or busy condemning ourselves that we forget that every moment of our lives we need God desperately just to survive in this life